Jan 16

Lines for my coming FB app

Category: Uncategorized

I am so going to do this.

Daniel Greenspan just vomited in the alley in back of a strip joint in the game “Degenerate Village.” Please help by throwing him a wet napkin!

… sodomized a chimpanzee in a dumpster in the game “Degenerate Village.” Please help by getting in line!

…farted under the covers in the game “Degenerate Village.”

… just stumbled over a trash can while rummaging in a dumpster for food in the game “Degenerate Village.” Please help by struggling for the choice morsel.

… just failed to sustain an erection while receiving the attentions of a $20 ‘ho because he was too wasted in the game “Degenerate Village.” Please help by tossing him an HIV test kit!

… flunked out of college because he spent all of his parents’ money on pizza and beer in the game “Degenerate Village.” Please help by letting him sleep in your basement!

…Offended his friends by making this FB app in the game “Degenerate Village.” Please help by un-friending him!

… sold chemical-laced baby formula in the game “Degenerate Village.” Please help by giving him your business!

… has just tossed you a pair of soiled undergarments in the game “Degenerate Village.” Please help by letting him use your shower!

… just fed alka-seltzer to pigeons in the game “Degenerate Village.” Please help by feeding flypaper to the neighbor’s dog!

… drank your whiskey shot when you turned around to greet friends in the game “Degenerate Village.” Please help by not understanding what happened because you’re drunk!

… just looked the other way in the game “Degenerate Village.” Please help by also pretending not to notice.

… found a fat wallet near the site of a lethal traffic accident in the game “Degenerate Village.” Please help by pointing him to the nearest liquor store!

… hung out at the 7-11 waiting for day jobs in the game “Degenerate Village.” Please help by hiring him to perform degrading tasks!

… failed to pay child support in the game “Degenerate Village.” Please help by finding a good lawyer!

… wants to give you a crack rock in the game “Degenerate Village.” Please help by breaking out your pipe!

… just stumbled into the polls and voted for the national socialist party because they gave him $5 in the game “Degenerate Village.” Please help by voting for the Communist party!

… stole candy from a child in the game “Degenerate Village.” Please help by diverting the police!

… has given you crabs in the game “Degenerate Village.” Please help by throwing him a lice comb!

… has embezzled millions of government TARP funds in the game “Degenerate Village.” Please help by criticizing Obama!

… has been bribed by Big Pharma in the game “Degenerate Village.” Please help by complaining about socialized medicine!

… wants to give you a bag of feces in the game “Degenerate Village.”

… has sweaty palms in the game “Degenerate Village.” Please help by letting him wash his hands in the gas station toilet tank!

… fell asleep in the sewer in the game “Degenerate Village.” Please help by urinating on him!

… found all of his things at the curb because he didn’t pay the rent in the game “Degenerate Village.” Please help by finding the nearest 24-hour grocery so he won’t freeze to death!

… ran when the rabbit done died in the game “Degenerate Village.” Please help by not telling anybody where he is!

… slept with his father’s underaged mistress in the game “Degenerate Village.” Please help by not telling Mom!

… piloted a drug submarine from Bogota to Florida in the game “Degenerate Village.” Please help by buying some junk!

… wants to put you in his porn movie in the game “Degenerate Village.”

… has just started receiving sexual favors from the neighbor’s daughter by blackmailing her in the game “Degenerate Village.” Please help by agreeing to not call the police as long as he gives you some of the action!

… just fired half of his employees but is still applying for their 401K benefits in the game “Degenerate Village.” Please give him a swiss bank account!

… wants to give you a huge pile of small bills in the game “Degenerate Village.” Please help by laundering it!

… wants to pop a cap in your ass in the game “Degenerate Village.” Please give him everything you have!

… wants to sell you some Danish child pornography while wearing a wire for the Feds in the game “Degenerate Village.”

… hasn’t figured out how to beat the rap in the game “Degenerate Village.” Please help by covering for him!

… just mugged the pizza man in the game “Degenerate Village.” Please light up and chow down in the back of his 1983 monte carlo!

… is cruising the playgrounds with his tinted-window van in the game “Degenerate Village.” Please help by giving him some duct tape!

… has hacked a computer and stolen 10,000 credit card records in the game “Degenerate Village.” Please help by tHrOw|nG sUm zErI0s ‘wAreZ!

… broke your window with a golf club in the game “Degenerate Village.” Please help by divorcing him!

… respectfully begs your attention to a sensitive matter concerning a Nigerian bank account in the game “Degenerate Village.” Please help by wire transferring the $1000 he needs to bribe officials!

… flushed some drugs while the SWAT team was breaking down your door in the game “Degenerate Village.” Please help him hide the guns!

… just pretended not to notice the bleeding woman calling for help on the street below because he needs to get up early for work tomorrow in the game “Degenerate Village.” Please help by calling the police for him because it’s not his job!

… has kicked your dog in the game “Degenerate Village.” Please keep your mangy mutt inside in the future!

… needs help running his slumlord business that is really a front for a prostitution ring in the game “Degenerate Village.”

… admires his haircut in a shattered piece of the mirror shard he used to slice your throat with in the game “Degenerate Village.” Please help by bleeding!

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